Glad The Past Few Months Are Over!!!

Hello Again,

It has been some time since I have posted. This past week has been a year since my surgery. In some ways it flew bye and in some other ways it has dragged on.

Going into the fall season, I was hit really hard with bone/joint pain. I was on the couch for 9 weeks, barely moving because the pain was from my neck down to my heels. It was chronic and severe. I think I had 60 vicodin in a 2 week time frame. The doctor took me off the Arimidex (anastrozole) and said in two weeks I should be better. At that time I was depressed and my activities came to a halt. The Arimidex is a pill I have to take for 5 years that blocks my body's naturally occurring estrogen since I was ER+ (estrogen receptor - positive). The side effects for that medicine are muscle/joint/bone pain, memory problems, increase risk of heart disease, hot flashes and mood swings. Sounds like fun huh? Well, 2 weeks went and gone. The oncologist wanted to take a look at a bone scan and test me for lupus. Bone scan showed I was riddled with arthritis but no bone cancer. Yeah for that!! No lupus too!! He tried some arthritis medicine. Still no relief. I had to resume some other type of hormone blocker within 4 weeks or the past six months of Arimidex would be lost. There have been nights that I wanted to go to the emergency room it hurt so bad. The following day I would call the doctor and he said they would have just given me morphine. He also told me that I was in the 10-15% of women that got the severe chronic bone pain. Again, I AM SPECIAL. Now it has been six weeks and the doctor tried a new estrogen blocker, Tamoxifen. The Tamoxifen side effects are deep vein thrombosis, blood clots in lungs, stroke, cataracts, memory loss, fatigue, hot flashes and mood swings. This pill I will have to take for 5 years. I was still in a lot of pain and starting to move somewhat after 8 weeks of lying around the house. I saw a rheumaltologist for the pain and again more pills to combat the pain and swelling. With the combination of Tamoxifen, anti-inflammatory and steroids I started to feel better. Thank God for the medications. I did not want to live out my life in that kind of pain or ever experience that bone pain again. The studies show that the Tamoxifen isn't as effective as the Arimidex but so far I have not experienced any bone pain. However, it did take 6 months til it showed its ugly head.

With my immune system stressed, the plastic surgeon did not want to do the symmetry operation on me November 18th as scheduled. Plus I gained too much weight and he wants those pounds off before he operates. So I think 1st quarter next year will be my target.

I am still going into the cancer center every 3 weeks for the Herceptin until the end of the year. That treatment seems to be going well.

I am so very thankful for my husband for listening to all my complaining, going to doctors offices with me, and just standing by me during this past year. He is my rock...my everything!!! The kids are wonderful supporters and have been there when I needed them or just stop in to say "hey". Life is Good again.

We had a scrumptious Thanksgiving dinner at Chris and Justine's (their first). They cooked 2 turkeys, one in the oven and a cajun style on the grill plus all the fixin's. I think that was one of my favorite Thanksgiving Dinners!! I did not cook. We have soooo much to be thankful for. Our blessing show up every day in some form or another.

During my bone pain days, we acquired a pit bull/lab mix 6 week old puppy. Her name is Remi. She did a lot of sleeping on top of me and peeing in the house. She is now 3 1/2 months old and doing much better and getting big. She follows me around everywhere. I told Ron if it weren't for Remi, I would have been in bed 24/7. She is currently enrolled in puppy preschool. She keeps me company while Ron travels. I have never had a dog before so it is all new to me...the training part. The loving is easy.

I hope this inspires you to take good care of yourself through the holiday season and to celebrate all that's right with yourself and your life, right here and now. I wish everyone a Merry Christmas and a safe New Years. You will probably hear from me again after my surgery.

God Bless you all,
Joanie

                  Life is like an art work. So I suggest to you to make it your masterpiece.

Finished With Chemo...YEAH!!!!



I had my last chemo treatment on March 19th and a clan there to help me celebrate... Flowers, balloons, cupcakes, smiles, friends and family, and oh yeah! a man on a guitar singing James Taylor...great day to celebrate NO MORE CHEMO.

Since March 19th, I have had the drug herceptin alone 5 times already. (I also had herceptin in conjunction with chemo). I go to the cancer center and have the treatment through my port every 3 weeks til the end of the year. I tested HER2 positive, a protein on the surface of the cancer cells that is aggressive and make the cells grow and divide rapidly. Herceptin works by attaching itself to the HER2 receptors on the surface of the breast cancer cells and blocks them from receiving growth signals and slows and hopefully stops the growth of breast cancer. Since I have the aggressive fast growing form of breast cancer, this medication is another tool for the doctors to prevent any further cancer cells from popping up. Again hats off to all those people who have been in the studies of the medications and the biologists and research labs. The side affects of this medication is reduced heart function and shortness of breath. I am monitored by having echo cardiograms every three months. This will only be temporary while on the medication. I hate to say it but I have not worked out in several months so I don't know about any shortness of breath. Soon I will start working out again.

I also started taking a drug called anastrozole (hormone replacement therapy) for 5 years, pill form. This drug reduces the amount of estrogen in my body. The cancer I have is estrogen fed, so we want to reduce any estrogen entering my body to slow and reduce the risk of the cancer spreading and any new cancer from developing. Ladies, please be aware that some personal care products have parabens in them that can mimic the hormone estrogen. Some of the breast cancer cells have traces of paraben in them. Studies are under way if parabens contribute to breast cancer that is estrogen fed. The side affects of anastrozole are fatigue, hot flashes, joint and bone pain, bone thinning and weakening.

In November maybe December I will go into phase 3 and start the process of breast reconstructive surgery. Dr. Song, plastic surgeon, wants to wait until the port is taking out, but my herceptin goes til end of December. I want to pull the port the end of the year in order to get that surgery on this year's insurance. If  I have the port taken out, then I would have to have the herceptin through a vein in my arm/hand for a few treatments. I am still weighing my options.

I also want to say that I am off all steroids and sleeping better and eating less. Yeah for that! My hair is growing back too! I mostly go out now without a hat. Sporting the short and sassy do!!!

OK all medical stuff (phase 2) is underway and I am doing super. In April, my sisters had a wedding shower for Justine and went on a cruise with all the kids. Enjoyed all the laughter and special time with our children and future daughter-in-law. No cell phones were awesome too. In May, busy busy busy with lunches, massages, showers, weddings, wine tastings, and dinners. In June, we attended a MS Function and our boys bartenders. A beautiful event to honor our friend Dolores (she facilitated my spiritual night before surgery) who has MS. On June 9th our son, Chris, got married to a lovely woman Justine. A romantic and beautiful intimate ceremony in front of the bell tower in Naperville followed by a reception at Morton's Steakhouse in Naperville. Scott and Lauren were part of the wedding party. At last a wonderful celebration of their love. Ron and I were so happy and proud. There were smiles on every ones face the whole night. The only problem was that it ended and time just flew by. The remainder of June is busy busy busy. In July, we are hosting an Open House to celebrate the marriage of Chris and Justine with over 100 people. So busy....

Since I have found out about my cancer, two of my school friends have also found out they have breast cancer. It is a cancer, that if found early, can be treated with great results. I am thinking of all those afflicted. 

I just want to thank you all for hanging in there with me throughout my diagnosis. I know you don't want to hear about my day to day activities so I thought I would update the blog on a quarterly basis. Stay tuned....

I have been so blessed and thank everyone for all the prayers, loving care that I was given.

God's blessings to each and every one!

Joanie

Proof That I Do Get Some Sleep!!!

So sorry I haven't blogged in a month.

Ron took this photo at 7:00 am before he went to work one morning. I must have gotten out of bed from tossing and turning not to disturb Ron and landed on the couch. We stole Jordan (dog) from Chris as therapy for me for a few days. She just loves cuddling up with me. Or is it the other way around!!! Anyways I did not hear Ron leave nor did Jordan...proof I do get some sleep and the dog loves me!!!

I had my 10th chemo treatment this Tuesday. I am almost finished, just 2 more to go. YEAH!!!! Doctor says I am doing really well and my blood work is on target. I have had a few more symptoms. I started experiencing tingling in my hands, feet and nose (neuropathy). I am still not getting much sleep and I am eating everything in sight...due to steroids. I convinced the doctor to take me off the oral steroids. Hopefully that will help some. I still get a bag of steroids during the chemo treatment weekly that the doctor won't consider taking me off. Dr. Hantel told me to take the RX Atrivan for sleep more during the week. I have been very hesitant to take the Atrivan mainly because it is addictive. We will see if I take the RX a little more than once a week will help my cause. Maybe then I will be able to sleep through the night. I am still having terrible hot flashes that constantly keep me awake and then sound sleep for 30 minutes and awake again. Menopause yuck!!!! And my mind is nothing but mush!!!!

I did have a terrible cold that lasted four days til I got into the desert in Palm Springs, CA. Yes that's right. I took a trip with Ron to the All Star (Dairy) Conference this past week for 5 nights. I was one of a few people that wore a mask on the plane. We hosted alot of dinners entertaining clients. My wig got quite a work out!!!! There are many gas heaters that heat the patios in California. I was very aware of them and stayed far away so that my wig wouldn't go up in flames. So you see I do learn my lessons well. I also read at the pool and did some shopping while Ron had his meetings and a few golf meetings as well. We also went to a play Follies that had a cast of elderly women and men from ages 62-82. They were in fantastic shape and very entertaining. The music was provided by Maureen McGovern, age 62 (sang theme song for Poseidon Adventure-"The Morning After"). The time between sets were much longer due to their age so they had an MC and a ventriloquist fill the space. A very good show. The cast puts this show on 9 times a week. Unbelievable and an unexpected surprise. The best thing about Palm Springs is the sunshine and always warm weather. I love it there. It was nice to get away with Ron and just chill.

The chemo is almost finished and I haven't like being put on hold. We are in the mist of plans for Chris and Justine's wedding in June, wedding shower in April, and a family vacation this Spring. As you see I am feeling very positive and ready to move forward. I see the end of the Phase One tunnel and it is freeing.

I love hearing from you all and your warm wishes are much appreciated. Thanks for being part of my world.

Joanie

Buzzed!!!

#4 Treatment went well. We saw Dr. Hantel before the treatment. He said my labs look good. I complained about not sleeping and was bragging about not losing my hair. He told me not to get too cocky that it will most likely go soon. Dr. Hantel lowered the dose of the oral steroids I take but kept the IV steroids.  We felt good that the process is progressing well for me.

The anticipation of losing my hair was agonizing. The patients I talked with all said I would lose my hair between the second and third treatments. I wasn't losing it but thinking about it made me anxious. Thursday I started to lose my hair.(The doctor was right about not being too cocky.) It  felt like needles were pricking my head. My hands were in my hair trying to ease the pain and hair would come out in clumps. It was hard to be in the kitchen thinking all that hair will fall into the food. I was sad and damaged. Friday I was in bed most of the day. Not really cuz I was sick but cuz I was grieving my hair loss. I got over it fast and Saturday woke up and told Ron we are buzzing my head today. I gave Ron his usual 4 week buzz cut and he was to buzz me when I was finished with him. With Ron's humor and compassion we got through the buzz without any tears. I am so blessed to have him be with me in good times and bad. I can't say enough how he has showed up and been there for me throughout this journey. Thanks hunny. Everyone who sees me tells me I have a nicely shaped head. Who are they kidding....I am BALD! It is cold so I wear a hat most of the time. I did wear my wig for 3 hours to see how I liked wearing it. It wasn't so bad. It was light and not terribly itchy.

#5 Treatment went well and quick this time...3 hours. I saw Dr. Song that Monday and he said that I could start reconstructive surgery the first week of May in time for Chris' wedding. Recovery for that would be a few weeks and it would be outpatient. Can you believe it-major surgery and you are operated on in the morning and out in the afternoon. Amazing!!!

Wednesday I went to get my wig styled at 3 pm. I felt so great, it looked fairly natural, and I didn't feel so damaged. I was very pleased with the style. I got home and Chris was there. I fixed him some dinner that a friend dropped off. It was in the oven for 30 minutes and decided to cut into it to see if the chicken was done. Well I still had my wig on and POOF! My beautiful wig was singed. Oh I was sooo sick to my stomach. They ALL warned me about the dangers of the oven, dishwasher, and grill. I didn't realize I had it on for only a few hours and BAMM I ruined it. Lauren walks in and said the damage wasn't bad and you couldn't see the netting. It just looked like it was teased. I didn't sleep that night at all. I looked at the wig in the morning and it really wasn't as bad as I felt it was the day before. I will probably take it back and get a little bit more trimmed off the wig to clean up the ends. I thought I was done with hair cuts and blow drys and hair products. Not quite. I will put conditioner on the wig, wash it, but not blow dry it!!!! Hopefully I can get used to wearing the wig and not be so dumb. So for now on the kitchen is WIG FREE. Haha hope you all enjoyed my trials and tribulations of my first wig experience. Can't you see me doing it!!!

Tuesday will be my 6th treatment. That means I will be half way finished. Yeah!!! I have enjoyed walking outside with the weather as great as it has been. Keep smiling.

Love, Joanie

#3 Ditto!!!

Tuesday was a longer day than usual. It took 5 hours this time. Mainly because the lab was backed up and the pharmacy was out to lunch. I drove myself back and forth to the Cancer Center. Lauren and Scott took an extra hour or so off at lunch time and sat with me while I received the chemo. We played a little cards and talked. It is so wonderful to have my family surround me with love and comfort. I feel Ron and I have done a great job raising our children. They are truly caring individuals.

Tuesday night Lauren and I went back to the Cancer Center and took a seminar on "Look Good, Feel Better". The American Cancer Society facilitated this 2 hour seminar. It contained information about cancer treatments, tying scarves, wigs, putting on makeup, and feeling good about yourself. It was very helpful and many cosmetic companies even donated a bag of makeup to each patient. We walked away with my face glamoured up with new makeup and Lauren demonstrating how to apply most of the makeup. I am thrilled Lauren is spending time with me during this process. Our relationship has reached a new level. Looking good and feeling great!!!

Last Friday, my Chicagoland sisters and sister-in-law met me in Oakbrook at the American Cancer Society and tried on wigs. They had many to choose from and lots of colors. I brought in a few treats for us and the volunteers to make it more of a party atmosphere. We decided on one that looked most like my own hair. I took it home that day. It is a synthetic wig and I am hoping it will stay on and not itch. I still have my own hair so it is hard to tell the fit. I just can't believe I was wig shopping. You all know how I hate shopping...period. I was so pleased to have my sisterhood surround me and lift me up for that appointment.

As I stated, I still have not lost my hair. From what I understand most people lose their hair between the 2nd and 3rd chemo treatment. I may be one of the lucky ones that do not loose my hair at all. Time will tell on that front. I am feeling good. Little jittery and flushed and not sleeping, but overall very well. I have started the elliptical 45 minutes a day. I figure I should keep my strength up.

I am so blessed to have so many family and friends in my life.

Joanie

#2 Ditto!!

2 down 10 to go...

The treatment session on Tuesday was only 3 1/2 hours. No waiting in the lab to get the blood work results back make the time go faster. I get the thumbs up OK to receive the chemo....blood counts are good.  The steroids, benedryl, taxol, herceptin all follow through the IV lines into my port one at a time. And before you know it I am ready to leave. It is as simple as that. I relax in a chair, read a book, watch tv, or just rest.

Wednesday I took Jordan for a walk. Orrrr should I say Jordan took me for a mile walk, then I took her the other 2 miles. Yes, I was well enough for a 3 mile hike. It was such a beautiful day here and probably the last til spring. So, yes, I had to get out. As long as I feel well, I am going to keep moving. Tomorrow is another day with snow in the forecast...I will be sleeping in. Brrrrr COLD!

On Friday, my sisters and I will be going to the American Cancer Society in Oakbrook to take a look at wigs. I plan on bringing some wine and comfort food. Having my sisters there will be quite a riot. It will be like dressing up when we were younger, putting on plays. I will keep you posted, maybe even take a picture or two.

All is well. God is Good.

Joanie

All Going Well

Just a short note to tell you I am doing JUST fine with no side effects thus far....

1 down and 11 to go. All went very smoothly and took 5 hours. I saw Dr. Hantel first and he went over my results of the blood work and echo cardiogram. All were great. He explained the side effects I may experience and probably down the line as my treatments continue they will show their ugly face. He said I may not have the mouth sores I was afraid of nor the nails falling off...with that news I was relieved already. I will be seeing Dr. Hantel every third week of treatments. I AM ready to start the treatments.
They put Ron & I in a private room because the nurse had to explain the treatments, the medicines, and the side effects.  They have another nurse double check the medications they give me as well as in the lab it is checked twice. I feel secure in the fact that they will not make any mistakes. It was not extremely busy in the rooms, she said they usually come in the morning and get their treatments done and continue their days. I moved the day to Tues mornings as that is best for Ron's schedule. The medicines did not affect me at all, but I could tell when the benedryl was pushed through cuz I got tired, but did not sleep. Ron and I talked most of the time, then he put on a DVD of Al Cappone. Ask me any questions about him, I may have the answers. haha
The staff makes you feel very comfortable and the nurse even had me get up and see the sunset today...it was beautiful!!!  A volunteer and her dog came to visit me as well. There are numerous classes such as nutrition, yoga, and reike classes and many informational resources available to me. I plan on registering several of the classes.

I feel I am in very good hands at the Cancer Center in Naperville. I saw a lady today complete her 12th chemo and it was her birthday, she had several people with her and there must have been a party because I got one of the cupcakes, double chocolate yum. I later found out that "this lady" was one of Chris' friend's mom....smalll world.

As you can see I feel great today and hope for a great week. I will probably start working out on Ron's elliptical this month then hopefully get back in the gym I joined in May.
Thanks for all the concern and prayers.

"God Does All Things Well"

I hope everyone had a Blessed Christmas and New Years. Our Christmas was intimate and full of laughter. All the kids came over for our traditional morning quiche (that wasn't done on time-a lesson I learned very well from my mom). The gifts were very meaningful and thoughtful. We are so blessed to have our loved ones around us during the holidays. We went to Sue and Duke's house in the late afternoon and enjoyed time with those that live in Chicagoland area. It was wonderful to see the nieces and nephews and now their children too. My brothers, sisters and my late sister's girls from afar (and all their spouses) presented me with a Gift of Love that will carry me through the chemo experience. The love and support that I get from them is overwhelming and always present. For that I am most thankful for. I love you all.

Ron and I went to interview the oncology doctor at University of Chicago. She layed out the same plan as the oncology doctor in Naperville. So we have decided to do the treatment in Naperville, since I really liked Dr. Hantel and his bedside manner, plus it is close to home.

On last Wednesday, I went in for the port placement. It was an hour long and all went well as expected. The port is a size of a quarter underneath the skin below my clavicle a half inch thick and is joined to the vein by a catheter. A bit bothersome but an easy access than always poking at my veins for the year-long treatments I am scheduled to receive. As we are walking up the stairs to our home, I was thinking that this is the 6th time I have needed help coming up the stairs with sedation in my system in the last 2 1/2 months. And really hoping that this will be my last procedure/surgery.

New Years was also very nice and intimate with our friends from high school at a fabulous dinner party in Elmhurst. The 4 other couples have known Ron and I for 38-41 years. We have seen all of us raise our children, have struggles in life, and shared in their joys. None of our children have married yet, and thankfully none of us have been in poor health. For that we are all thankful and raised our glasses to the toast of 2012 and good health.

Now I come to the point that I am receiving my first chemo treatment today at 12:45. What I am feeling is some anxiety and nervousness of the unknown. How will my body react to this poison that is entering my veins? I wish that I didn't have to go through this, but I know it is the right course of action. I sorta wished that I went to see the Cancer Center before the treatment so that I know what to expect. I am visualizing an open room with IV lines hanging above many chairs. I think my first reaction would be that there will be very sick people in those chairs and that I will feel really sorry for them and what they are going through. Right now, I don't feel like I am one of them. My story will not be like theirs. That I am only doing this as a precaution. I DO NOT look or feel like a cancer patient...at least not yet.

I have been receiving so many compliments that I look great. I feel great!!! I have recovered from surgery very well. But what I really feel is that the glow from me is God radiating from my soul. I have given myself fully to this adventure of paying attention to His Presence in my life. I trust in Him. And He will carry me forward. I was at a memorial this past week, and the message from the priest was that "God Does All Things Well". No matter if you think He has done you wrong/taken a loved one from you, He has done it according to His plan. With all His Power and Glory, I have confidence and peace. God Does All Things WELL.

Thank you to my families and friends. The support and kindness is appreciated and carries me forward in these next 12 weeks.

Joanie